Monday, February 24, 2014

What is happiness?

     I've recently been asking myself this a lot.  In my head it seems like I should be happy.  I have a nice home, a stable job, 3 beautiful children and yet lately I have been feeling rather depressed.  Interestingly in the last few weeks I have received several comments praising certain aspects of my life and yet I still don't feel "happy" inside.  This has led me to question what is happiness, what brings happiness.  I thought the praise of others might be enough; but alas, I still feel empty.  Wealth? Nope doing great, have plenty of money, plenty of "things" and yet not satisfied.  What brings peace, happiness, fulfillment.
     Maybe it is different for everyone, what we aspire for and when we feel of worth but I've found for myself, my happiness can only come from inside. No matter how much praise I get, it is like a drug - makes me feel good for a few seconds but then gone and doesn't last.  I feel at peace when I am living up to the beliefs I hold inside.  When I am me, I feel good.  When I conform to the views or opinions of another, when I am untrue to myself, nothing can bring back that sense of belonging and for me belonging in my own skin is my sense of happiness.
    So in order to live true to myself I must first know who I am.  I am a child of God, I was sent to this earth with a purpose.  I am loyal and kind.  While not a woman of many friends, I will remain a true friend to the end.  I am a nurturer, a person who cares for the well being of others, both spiritually, mentally and physically.  I am a peacemaker, I like to find solutions, resolve issues, avoid contention and concede a point to allow peace to reign.  I am a hardworker, willing to put in long hours for what I find important.  I am thoughtful in deed and in mind, thoughtful towards others, and thoughtful in reasoning.   I am a lover of knowledge.  I am quick to act and respond.  I am quick to perceive.
     When I don't act in accordance with who I am, I find myself unhappy.  When I don't care for others but gossip or judge, I am less than who I am.  When I don't give my all at work or home I know I am capable of more.  When I hold friendships light and don't keep up I am not at peace with who I am
So what makes you happy?
 

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