I believe in me

We were having a discussion about beliefs and what kind of things we believe in, some small some big.  My friend said, "I believe in myself."  She didn't mean it like she thought she was great, but that she believes that she has a purpose and that she is capable of doing good things.  When we get to heaven will we be able to say I did my best, I was me and I was true to myself.  Or will I have to explain why I wasn't me.  So I don't want to be asked - why weren't you you, why did you try to conform to someone else's viewpoint, why didn't you use all the gifts I gave you.  

     The problem with the above is this: I think it is hard to know who I am.  There are things that define me, but aren't really me - I am a doctor, I am a mother but these are hats I wear they aren't my core, they aren't me.  So I have set off this week to find out what I believe in and a little more about who I am.  I feel like if I know who I am and I am true to that I don't need to feel guilty for all the little things outside of me, and I don't have to be embarrassed or sad if someone disagrees with my opinion or viewpoint (that doesn't give me license to be rude to someone else's viewpoint), but I don't need to take it personally.  So often we compare ourselves to others, but why - why aren't we good enough who we are.  We should constantly be striving to improve ourselves, better the me that's already inside, but not change to be someone else.  I'm an introspective philosopher not a talker, I like small groups not large amounts of people.  What can I do in this realm (have more one on one chats, develop loyal friendships) what about me can I believe in and excel at.  

     This is not to say that if I like to yell I should go ahead and yell we have both positive and negative personality traits but when we learn what those traits are, I think we are then more free to use them, improve them and judge only ourselves, not others and not let others judgement effect us.  So you may here what I believe about myself through the remainder of the week - I hope it inspires you to think of you and not to think I am full of myself or that you need to be more like me - Just be more like you.